It has been 3 years now since my late father passed away. 3 years ago, I was at home when I received a call from Jean, my brother’s wife. I was just numbed after that. For weeks thereafter, my life was in turmoil. I still shed a tear a few days ago, when I tried to recall the last few days of my father’s life. No one saw it coming. He had been unwell and was in hospital for a short while a few months earlier. He was better and was resting at home. No one knew what happened. My mother found him lying on the floor early on the morning of 30 November 2006. He was gone by then. He could have been gone the night before, no one knows.
3 years hence, and death has become a less distant event. I think you live most when you best appreciate death’s reality. I have been learning to hold back less. I have had to tell myself to not worry so much about saying the wrong thing – it is more important to say something if you have feelings or opinions on a matter, than to hold back while you find out more. Unless of course, you are on the pulpit and what you say is taken to be the gospel truth – then you really do have to be sure what you are saying is properly backed up one way or another.
I now tell someone how I feel about that person, a lot more readily. If I thought that person did well or was honourable for example, I’d call it and let that person how much I appreciated it. If on the other hand someone behaved poorly I’d also call it out and let that person know. If that person dislikes it, what is the worst that can happen? Will he injure or even kill me? I was going to die anyway. So instead of dying say 30, 40 years later I’d die sooner in that person’s hand? So what – what is 30, 40 or even 50 years from the perspective of eternity? We need to conduct ourselves in a manner which is driven to truth and better relationship with each other and making things better, and not tolerate poor behaviour which compromises truth or causes us to treat each other poorly or brings down the quality of human behaviour and relationships. That way we make a difference and make the most of this very short life.
Ante 