Sofia’s

We hadn’t been to Sofia’s for a long time. On Tuesday Tress had a little shopping event at her work place and I caught up with her in the city, just outside her building. We went home together and it was later than the usual time for Tress. We could have stayed home to cook dinner but we thought we haven’t been to Sofia’s for a while – kiddo would like that, so we went home, change and headed there.

We used to go on almost every Friday, sometimes on an additional weekday as well. So the people there knew us as regulars and we could pick out the regular staff there.

On Tuesday night we realised there was a number of new staff. The waiter who attended to us was an Indian chap and he especially tried to be helpful. He had a thick Indian accent so he’s probably not a locally born version. He had trouble explaining to us the features of a “baked avocado” and a “seafood pancake”. We were trying to decide between the 2 for an entrée and he ended up making it even more difficult for us – both dishes were seafood  – “prowns” with a cheese sauce. Apparently the only difference was one was served on baked avocadoes and the other, on pancakes.

Actually that made sense. This “family restaurant” offers quick service and value. Food is ok – maybe even good – but never great. Certainly it has never been imaginative or exciting. We like it because it’s near our home, is a BYO and like I said, was relatively cheap and offered huge servings. I guess creating dishes based on similar features allowed it to charge lower prices. Besides, the place is always very spacious and had a fun atmosphere. We always left with 1 or 2 takeaway containers with leftovers.
 
Gordon Ramsay

The theme of eating out and Indian people continued when we reached home. My current favourite television program is “Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares”. Gordon Ramsay swears like Ronaldo doing step-overs. You get a staple minimum every time either one gets “on stage”. I don’t suppose he needed to swear that much to make the program interesting but I think asking Gordon Ramsay not to swear would be to get something less than the full monthy. You wouldn’t be getting the real thing. The result would be very different, I think.

Anyway because I was home so early, we could actually have dinner outside, come home and fix lunches for the next day, and settle down to watch my favourite program. Like I said, the theme of restaurants and Indians continued for the evening because the feature restaurant was an Indian restaurant. Those of you who watch this program know being a feature restaurant means you had a pretty crappy restaurant. This one was probably as bad as it gets. Thankfully we’ve had our dinner as the scenes with the cockies would have been the perfect dieting – or bulimic – tool.

While we were watching Gordon beat up the proprietor and staff of the Purnima (nee Dhillon) restaurant, Tress was busy showing us the fruit of her labour at the staff shopping event. They all looked great and as usual, she fussed over who should get which piece – she often shares the spoils of her battles.
Gordon finished around 9.30 and by 10 we were in bed.
 
ICC Home Groups

Our church has “relaunched” the home group meetings.  The group we were in was moving along quite well, I thought. The leaders must have thought otherwise. Our group, which had about 15 persons on a regular basis, was also the namesake of this blog. It met in a church leader’s home initially but in recent times (before it was dismantled) met in our home.

I believe there were a few who, as a result of our home group, had become closer to other church members. I for one, felt that outside of the home group environment, I would not have known a few of them. So home group is a good thing, I guess. Whether it would continue to be good would depend on how members react to being thrown together in different groupings/dynamics. It goes without saying that it takes a certain chemistry or dynamics for a group to gel and work well. If those elements aren’t there, the groups won’t work well.

Maybe the church context requires spiritualising – for chemistry and dynamics maybe some would say it takes the Spirit of God to provide the adhesive and grease. I have no doubt the Spirit of God can and does play that role. But I also think that it is true only if that group is genuinely committed to the cause, ie fulfil the Great Commission, for example.

Where the home group is likely to serve the (more likely) purpose of providing a platform for more interaction (fellowship) and care (love), I think the chemistry and dynamics must be right. I therefore think the newly constituted home groups will morph for a while before settling down to more cohesive groups. Some will break up and cease meeting. Some will roll on famously and get on like a house on fire. Maybe, just maybe, there may just be a group which will try to obey the Great Commission and let God do His thing.

This brings up the question of whether these groups should have been constituted on a consultative basis. Presently they have been put together mainly on the basis of where the members live. So if 2 members happen to live in the same suburb but can’t get along, they are put in the same group anyway. Conversely, if 2 members get along really well but live in opposite ends of Melbourne, there is no chance they would be in the same group.

There is a reluctance to attempt a group change. Members have to tiptoe to consult with leaders of the affected groups if they want to be in a different group. This is because the coordinator had made a statement that everyone should make an attempt to get along. To not attempt to get along would be to deny the ability of God to “make possible the impossible”.

This is the familiar no go zone. Tell someone he or she should do something because that was God’s will, or not to do something because that would be against God’s will, and you are effectively taking away the freewill of that person. Sometimes that is necessary. Often however, that is wrong. Once you throw God into the equation, there is no room for rebuttal.

It may not have been a conscious attempt but throwing God into the equation is to kill off discussions. There is no other way and you’d have to do it that one solitary way, because that is what “God ordained”.  To seek a group change surely isn’t denial of the power of God to make me get along with say, a Manchester City fan or that officer in Bank Negara Malaysia who made life hell for me for almost a year in the late 90s. I just don’t feel comfortable in that group and want to see if I can fit in better in another group.

Maybe I’m not aware of the consultation which may have gone on in the background before the distribution was made. I think it is just a case of not having a full time minister in the church. Things like this takes a long time to plan. The coordinator and other leaders are all holding down full time jobs. If they feel anything like I do, there would be so little time at the end of each day, to do all these other things.

It would have been far easier to perform this task on a desktop computer instead of going through one or more rounds of jigging and re-jigging the make-up of the groups. That may have been the cause of this. Or maybe I’m not being fair to the coordinator. Maybe there was a genuine intention to get members to get along no matter what and it isn’t simply for lack of time or effort that group make-up did not undergo a consultative process.

I guess it simply isn’t easy. The point is these groups should have very long term outlook. Investing a few weeks to get them right would have been time well spent. As it is, it feels like a rush job which would cause a few problems before these groups can properly function and serve their purpose. We’d all have to pull that much harder.